Tuesday, September 20, 2005

New day but same old crap......

Okay today the fatigue was just as bad okay maybe way worse. Who the hell knows. It definitely is kicking my butt though more so than ever. More than the last almost 5 years that I have had MS. I have been having the hardest time even getting out of bed in the morning to do anything. Problem is I have 2 kids to get up, dressed, and ready to walk out the door. Not to mention that cater to my husband's needs. I don't mind at all as he does it more so for me most of the time. I stayed in bed just lying there until like 1p.m. or so. It was quite relaxing but I felt bad because of Kaylee. She did come in my room and lay with me most of the time. I am gonna hope that tomorrow will be less a tiring day. I went to bed around 8p.m. last night and only got up to go to the bathroom it was relaxing. Got my shot in my ass which by the way this damn REbif burns so incredibly bad I don't know if I can handle the full 44mcg dose. We shall see....
I am looking in to going back to school. My brain needs the exercise and I miss school so much. I really enjoyed school when I was a kid. So we shall see what the future brings for my absolute boredom. I can get on here and do what?? I can only do do much on the net then I have nothing else to do. I can only clean my house so much. I can only talk on the phone to these imaginary friends that do not exist so long. I can only go to god knows where a few times a week. My point is I need more of an out, more of a release, More of a life. I do not want friends that is for sure as they do not understand at all. My "friend" Aurora gets mad when I do not wanna go here or there when I am just too damn fatigued or tired. She said the last time she invited me to go somewhere with her...So do u wanna go to the city and do some shopping , I said well....she interrupted..let me guess you are sick right?? Of course you are like always. Well I will talk to you later. You know what Fuck here and the damn horse she rode in on. See with friends like that I don't need friends at all. I'm so much happier without friends.

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