Tuesday, February 21, 2006

Everything feels strange and maybe different lately......

I guess maybe and most likely everything is like this due to the fact that I have to go to bed ALONE. I mean I guess I could stay up until 12:30 but no thank you. I mean I LOVE Quorry and HATE going to bed alone but please remember that I do have children that I have to get up with in the morning. I guess I just have to get used to this, don't really have much of a choice now so I??? I guess that I can't bitch too much as he is home 3 out of the 4 days a week. This week was ok I guess but for some strange reason felt as though we spent NO time together. Obviously Friday was a lil busy as we had to go to dentist. Then my bitchy sister came and spent the night. Let me tell you if seems like I bitch and moan and complain too much well I have NOTHING on her. She comes and I did not want her here wasn't even going to answer the phone the next few times she called but Quorry didn't know her phone number so he did so I had no choice but to talk to her. She said that she needed to stay out here for at least Friday night for some stupid Home and Garden Party. Not my problem I told her but yeah you can stay but you have to bring something to drink for your kids for the weekend as I was not providing as I didn't have enough for all 5 kids for Friday night. I also told her that by the time she got here we would have eaten already so she would have to feed her own kids. Now normally I feed everyone but I hadn't gone grocery shopping in weeks and honestly had nothing to feed children for dinner. Heck we even ordered out for our kids for Friday night. I just get sick and tired of my sister judging me at how she is soooo much better than me and how she does better for her kids and blah blah blah. Now give me your HONEST opinion.....My sister has a roommate because she can't "afford" to get her own place(now mind you her income is about the same as ours), She has no one but her and her 2 kids what I mean by that is she is a single mother of 2 kids both of which have different fathers, oh yeah she is the person who moved into the roommate situation she dose not have the brains I guess enough to do finances. How is that better than me?? I own my own house have a brand new car, no roommates. As far as 2 different kids by 2 different fathers well I have no room to be talking there as I am ashamed to say I have 2 kids that have different fathers. Big difference between my sister and I is that #1 I was 14 when I had my first yeah stupid and foolish I know and Andrews father was 18 I was young and naive. My 2nd Gerrott his father and I were together and he became alcoholic almost overnight or at least that is how I saw it, he hit me once and that was it 1 strike you are out and was not gonna let him be like that to me. Even still stupid reasons but the fact is today I take care of all of my kids even with this bullshit disease.

Yesterday when Bradley awoke him, Kaylee, and I all sat down and ate breakfast. He was saying that he needed a tissue because he had an "eye booger" that was driving him nuts. I got him one and said well you did just get up. We went on with our day. But as the day went on he kept saying mom I got more "eye boogers" and they just won't stop. Then when I looked at him less than 2 hours after breakfast his eye was really red and swollen looking like someone punched him in the eye. As the day progressed he just was looking worse everytime I looked. I called the dr. and got him an appt. for today. He went to the dr. to get the confirmation of what I thought maybe it could be and that was Pink Eye and oh yeah on top of that the poor little boy has an ear infection. I feel sooooo bad for him. He cried both time I gave him his eye drops today. They sting real bad he says. How is this fair for a 5 year old to have to go through all of this?????

4 Comments:

Blogger personallog! said...

Yet again you show us how hard you are! I am so proud of you for raising the kids no matter who there dads are! You have done the right thing by looking after your kids in the best way that you can.It seems from this end of the woods that you are doing a great job! Hope your 5 year old gets better soon! I couldnt do what you do!

Love and hugs
Dave!
p.s the dave and Jen link wont work anymore!sorry!

6:03 AM  
Blogger amanda said...

thanks for being proud makes me feel good!!! GREAt Job?? Maybe some days. You'd be surprised I think that anyone who HAD to do what I do could do it if they had to.

I noticed that the Dave & Jen link didn't work ne more. I'm gonna delete it.

Love and hugs right back at ya

2:55 PM  
Blogger mdmhvonpa said...

Pink eye and and ear infection ... poor bugger. Jake had that combo a few times and it just broke my heart.

8:46 AM  
Blogger amanda said...

I feel sooo bad for him but he pretty much seems notmal now. HIs eye drops the first few time scare the living be jesus outta him he said it didn't hurt was just scared. He isn't even here for the night he is at grandma's for the night and loving it!!!

9:05 PM  

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